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Heavy Sarcasm

McRib of Death

Death on a Bun And I quote… The famous sandwich -- which the Chicago-based fast food chain first offered in 1981 and describes as ‘a seasoned boneless pork slathered in tangy barbecue sauce and topped with slivered onions and tart pickles’… Good Lord how can anyone actually order, yet alone eat this ...

No Phones at the Urinal

It is pretty sad that I actually have to write this down, but if I were President, one of the first (and there are many) Executive Orders that I would sign would make mobile phone usage near a urinal a Federal Offense. That’s all I should have to say, but I’ll say more, just for fun… Fellow guys, seriously, ...

The Perfect Chai Latte

Since I unexpectedly gave up coffee a year or so ago (unplanned result of a 26-day cleanse), I have become fairly well-versed in tea. I’ll usually have a caffeinated tea in the AM - otherwise mostly just some herbal tea. No biggie at home, but since I like to work from coffee shops when I can, it can be a challenge since ...

How to Wake Up Early

There would appear to be endless articles, blogs, research, etc on "how" to wake up early. There are countless others on "why", but the "how" ones intrigue me the most. Let me save you all a LOT of time and energy. Are you ready for it? QUESTION: HOW DO YOU WAKE UP EARLY? ANSWER: WAKE UP EARLY (EX - As ...

“True” Age Test

In the interest of public service, and having nothing to do with making millions by my company going public at some point or being purchased by Warren Buffet, I have designed a method of measuring your “true” age (patent pending). I’m sure you know what your biological age is, but you know the old saying “you are ...

Car Rental Robbery

Operator:        “9-1-1, what is your emergency”Joe:                  “I was just raped by Hertz”Operator:        “Who is Hertz sir – male or female – are you safe now?”Joe:                  “Hertz, the rental car company”Operator:        Click…dial ...

Good Service – An Alternate Unviverse

On a recent evening, I had to run to our local “Commons” (foofy term for a collection of fancy strip malls) for a few things. I don’t generally spend a lot of time there, as primarily I despise shopping. But it needed to be done and as I say to many things, it wasn’t going to do itself. (Other examples: “Those ...