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Heavy Sarcasm

Kohl’s is Krazy

After a short 15-minute visit to Kohl’s last night, I am pretty sure I figured it out. What exactly did I figure out, you ask? Great question. I figured out how the Kohl’s department store is so successful. And here is the thesis for my upcoming Masters project: Kohl’s utilizes CIA-level confusion techniques to not ...

Guaranteed Weight Loss!

Here it is folks - Joe's guaranteed weight loss program. With these maybe not-so-easy, yet effective steps, I can promise you will lose weight. Ready? Here we go:   Step 1: Have surgeon (preferably, but if unavailable a Boy Scout enough badges will work) cut "small" (in very relative terms) incision in your neck, ...

The New News

A couple years or so ago, I pretty much stopped watching the news. It’s really all the same crap, in my opinion, and 98% of it (not a scientific study there) is negative. Bypassing any of the partisan nonsense, which is also basically pointless, I do NOT believe that the news even remotely accurately reflects what is really ...

Conference Rules

So I have attended my fair share of conferences over the years, but the one I just returned from “inspired” me to create a short list of “suggestions” for future conferences. These are suggestions for the attendees, not the organizers – and I would like to think that all of these fall into the “common sense” ...

My Words are My Own

(rant on) I have to get this one off my chest before I stuff my head in the wall. Why, in God's creation, do people feel compelled to put "my words are my own", or something to that effect, in their social media profiles!? The "PC" side of it is to make sure people don't misinterpret their words as speaking for the ...

The Polite Pedestrian

(Warning - heavy sarcasm here - saddle up folks!) I have been noodling this one for a little while now, but for some reason today I feel the need to cleanse myself of these thoughts - I am going to blame this little bit of "therapy" on the stupid time change thing that for some dumb reason we are forced to do twice a year ...

Standards

Here are some items in this world that I just do not understand why they cannot be standardized.  I’ll highlight them, and maybe rant just a bit (I’ll try to keep it to a minimum): Gas Caps – Why the #$*&@#! isn’t the spot to fill your gas tank on the same side for at least your average sedan-type vehicle?  I ...

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