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I have lost my mind

This isn’t a rant – not a complaint – nothing negative – and no, I’m not going to bitch about your driving.  So relax.  Just read and let me know on a scale of 1 (entirely normal) to 10 (bat sh*t crazy) you think I might be.

This is a random compilation of what I’m going to call “stuff” – not sure what else to call it.  Discussion points?  Stuff to talk about at the bar?  Jeopardy questions?  Or maybe, like the title says, I have just completely lost my mind.

That said, enjoy…

  • Why is it that I can heat up a place of rice to around 1,200F in about 90 seconds in a microwave, but it still takes forever to toast an english muffin?  Seems like maybe toaster technology hasn’t advanced in quite some time.  If you invent something better based on this, just give me the first one free and we’ll call it even.
  • I torture my friend (who will rename nameless) with random, irrelevant, and mindless facts on a regular basis.  So figured I’d share my latest with all of you:  Regarding pigs – “In a 2012 study of ‘high performance boars’, the average duration of ejaculation was around 6 minutes.  There was considerable variation, with one male apparently yielding semen continuously for 31 minutes”.  I’m sorry, but holy !#$(*&!@.  Nothing more to say there.  Wish you were a pig maybe?  Wow.

If you are really bored some time, check out https://factfinder.census.gov/faces/nav/jsf/pages/index.xhtml   On that page, you can find out all sorts of interesting statistics.  Such as:

* As of 2015, 6.3% of males were pursuing a degree in Education, but for females it was 18.6%
* As of 2014, there were 783,100 same-sex couples reported in the US.  Of those, 83.6% were white and 7.4% were African-American.  Their average household income was $117K.
* As of 2014, 14.2% of the US was uninsured.

  • Between Onstar (if you have it in your car), mobile phones with GPS, IPASS or whatever your toll collection system is (if you have one), there HAS to be a TON of data out there about where we are, when we are there, and how long we stay.  So where is that data, and how long before someone starts to use or sell it?  Pretty sure that would make the Wikileaks dude look like yesterday’s news.  Noodle that one a bit.
  • My daughter brought up the idea tonight that we should have a “National No Cell Phone Day”.  From her, that is an AMAZING suggestion – she is 15, so just imagine how much she uses her phone.  Anyway, can you imagine that?  No texting.  No work emails while laying in bed.  No Facebook on the toilet.  No conference calls in the car.  No annoying guy on the train talking too loud.  Wonder what it would take to pull that one off?
  • Here’s a business idea for someone with a ton of dough and energy.  My Dad is BARELY qualifying for “supportive” living (VERY similar to assisted living).  That said, he is WAY over-qualified for a nursing home.  I am 100% certain that I am not the first, nor will be the last, person to experience this situation.  Lots of potential solutions, I suppose – but they are ALL super expensive.  Solve that challenge, and you will be a wealthy person.
  • Another random fact – I am told that banging your head against the wall burns about 150 calories per house.  Based on that the pounds should just be falling off of me.  Feel free to use that one at work some time.

I will leave you with this funny item.  It is a diagram of how commercial airplanes should be laid out.  If you don’t find it amusing, then you should run to your therapist immediately as you clearly have major issues.  Either that, or you never travel.  Click HERE for the web page with the diagram.

One more before I go…

how-to-stop-snoring



  • Greg Loyd

    Just a thought about the muffin. Try placing the muffin on a piece of aluminum foil & place it in the microwave for about 10-15 seconds. That should toast it quite well. Oh yes, & stand AWAY from the microwave while toasting. 😉 *** GO CUBS ***

    • aeroimages

      I’ll be sure to put a metal butter knife through it as well – that should hit maybe 5,000F then!

  • Uncle Sharkey

    Based on your taking notice of the pig’s incredible abilities, I’d have to give you a solid seven…

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