Commuting is FUN!
For those of you that know me, you know I don’t commute anymore – mostly working from home. But I think it’s good to commute at least every once in a while, if for no other reason than to remind me that I should dust off the rosary beads on a regular basis and thank God that I don’t have to commute anymore.
That said, I wondered on my way in today which of the following rush hour offenders pisses people off the most. And please don’t tell me that they don’t piss you off, you know they do. I have my personal preferences, but I’ll withhold those as I’d love your feedback.
So here’s the question at hand – if you had only ONE of those yellow boot things that lock on a wheel so people can’t drive, which of the following rush hour offenders would you slap it on?
1 – Toll Booth Slow Driver – (This may be an Illinois thing only, since we charge tolls on the vast majority of our Chicagoland highways – if Mayor Emmanuel or Mike Madigan had their way they would probably charge a toll at drive thrus as well) When entering or exiting the highway, there is the toll lane (usually on the left) for I-PASS users where you don’t have to stop. I realize that there is technically a speed limit in those lanes – anywhere from 15mph to 30mph, depending on the highway. But let’s be honest here – NOBODY pays any attention to those unless a) you are a student driver (they get a pass) or b) you are THAT GUY that pisses everyone off and causes many rear-end jobs.
2 – Left Lane Violators – I have ranted about this one in other blogs, but anyone driving slow in the left lane during rush hours should be subject to special torture, in my opinion. You may not be in a rush, but there is a reason they call it “rush” hour, so don’t tell me to just get up earlier – that ain’t happening. Move over or speed it up – end of discussion.
3 – 3-handed people – Why do they need three hands? Because one is holding a phone to their ear (illegal in most states now) and the other is holding their grande, non-fat, half-caf, no-whip, mocha, caramel, double-cup, 2 Splenda, latte. (Remember the rule – the longer the coffee order, the bigger the asshole) You may also find this person with an iPad mounted on the dash so they can follow along with the conference call they are listening in on. Possibly even a laptop in the passenger seat.
4 – Makeup – NO – You know exactly who I am talking about here. The person that has either their visor down or their rear-view mirror adjusted so that they can put on their eye shadow, eye liner, lipstick, blush, or some other makeup-related item that I am not aware of. Can someone tell me how texting while driving is illegal (and I think there is lobbying happening to have it added as the 11th commandment), yet this is not!? Does Revlon have a stronger congressional lobby than AT&T and Verizon?
I’m sure there are more – let me know what I missed.
And let me know which of the above gets the ONE boot that you have!